Another fine opening! Now that Dwight owns the building, he’s looking for new sources of revenue, so he’s decided to open a day-care center, run by Cousin Moze and located in one of the creepiest rooms of the building, made creepier by the décor, which includes an Insane Clown Posse poster (where “Insane” and “Posse” are crossed out); a chest of plastic forks and knives (for imaginative fun); and buckets for number one, number two, and, uh, feed.
Back at the regular episode, Michael, following his spanking incident last week, has been ordered to undergo several hours of counseling with his arch-nemesis Toby (who, naturally, has a degree in social work). However, the sessions largely consist of Michael glaring at Toby and only opening his mouth to deliver the next insult. But at least he’s getting some sort of help, because, as Phyllis says, “He’s got a lot of issues and he’s stupid.”
Meanwhile, Dwight’s boycotting the Steamtown Mall and demands that the rest of the office join his crusade…whatever that is, because he says his reasons for the boycott are none of their business. To get everyone else on board, he plans on calling up all Mall-related clients and delivering an excoriating, profanity-laden tirade.
So far, it’s worked at losing Andy’s clients. Jim quickly diffuses the situation, and Dwight reveals that his anger derives from an incident the day before, when the owners of one of the stores refused him service…sort of…based on his appearance. Kelly suggests that he doll himself up, go back to the shop, and “Pretty Woman their ass.” Creed suggests they start their own mall, which Erin spastically seconds. Jim goes with Kelly’s idea, and Andy invites himself along to give Dwight a makeover.
And Pam’s struggling with her sales, ultimately deciding that she’s not cut out for it (“The thing that’s unfair about sales is that it’s based on commissions, so if you suck at sales, you don’t make any money. Well, I guess that’s fair”). Opportunity knocks when a traveling salesman asks to see the office administrator, and Pam steps up to the post, which doesn’t actually exist, but hey, it beats waiting for a promotion.
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