For a movie that makes mention, nearly every five minutes or so, that this is Detroit, it seems odd that they would offer almost no evidence beyond cars. The Metropolitan? No, you silly bastards, the paper of Detroit is the Free Press. We drink Vernor’s and wholly expect to get shot exiting to both Joe Louis and Metro.

No mention of 8 Mile? Nothing of Motown? Not a word of Comerica Park. Hell, I don’t even live in Detroit, and — oh, and nothing about the Red Wings, either — and I know to reference all that.

There’s a point to that rant — as Brick Mansions is a movie about not quite getting there. The name, which is iterated an reiterated so many times before the title actually appears that I thought it had already appeared when it finally does, is Detroit 2018…or Arkham City: Detroit, a walled slum that is a world unto itself.

It has its own economy, the nature of which is never elaborated upon, and controlled largely by drug-lord Tremaine Alexander (rapper RZA) — how he became so rich and powerful selling to bums is also not very clear — who is presently engaged in catching the feisty Lino (David Belle), a slippery parkour enthusiast whose job is, apparently, swiping drugs from Tremaine’s operation and disposing of them at inopportune times.

The film opens with an impressive display of Belle’s agility, as he tumbles, glides, wall jumps, belt-lines, and neutralizes Tremaine’s thugs with minimal prejudice throughout his run-down apartment complex. It’s a good set piece, and director Camille Delamarre has a steady enough grasp of geography that you don’t get lost following Lino’s escape, but the camerawork, being yet another lift of Bourne‘s shaky cam, often makes it difficult to see what Belle is actually doing. It doesn’t ruin the sequence, and subsequent set pieces, but they’re innovative and skillfully executed by Belle, they deserve more.

In salute of this weekend’s debut of Marvel Comic’s The Avengers, it’s time to rediscover another Marvel character who’s had three different film versions and hopefully one of these days, they’ll get it right. Dolph Lundgren stars in the first adaptation of The Punisher (1989).

The Punisher was always my favorite Marvel character because he didn’t have superhuman strength, he couldn’t shoot webs out of his wrists, or defeat evildoers with a metal alloy suit; he was nothing more than a badass vigilante who went out and wasted criminal scumbags left and right. He was one of the darkest characters that ever came out of the Marvel universe. So with this first film version, the writers decided to take some extra crappy liberties and change the story around.

In the comics, Captain Frank Castle was a decorated U.S. Marine whose family was killed by gangsters. Broken, disillusioned by the corrupt justice system, Castle decided to take the law into his own hands and became the Punisher who over the years forged some uneasy alliances with other Marvel heroes like Spiderman, Daredevil, and many others.

When you think of hot female assassins/badasses, who comes to mind? For me it’s a cross between Anne Parillaud in the original La Femme Nikita, Uma Thurman’s The Bride in Kill Bill, Devon Aoki as Miho in Sin City and Yvonne Strahovski as Sarah in Chuck.

Put all those together and that would be a potent mix indeed. Now, it seems, we may be able to add Zoe Saldana to that mix.

Why? Well today, Sony Pictures has released a trailer for Colombiana, which stars Saldana as a stone-cold female assassin. To illustrate the point, we’ve got the trailer for the film to share with you.

Colombiana was written by Luc Besson and Robert Mark Kamen and directed by Olivier Megaton (who has a perfect name for an action director, don’t you think?) Check out the trailer after the jump.

And no, that pic above is not from the movie. It’s from The Losers, but I like it — and so should you.

Who’s your favorite female baddass?