Comedy Central has picked up the rights to three new series, The Burn, Review with Forrest MacNeil, and Nathan For You.

The Burn will star Jeff Ross, best known for his Comedy Central Roast apperances. He will be joined by a group of fellow comics to rip apart the week’s current events and will take aim at public figures. Ross, who has appeared in the last nine Comedy Central Roasts, is executive producing The Burn with Mike Gibbons and Tagline TV’s Willie Mercer and Amy Zvi.  Production will start this spring for a premiere in the summer. “My mission is clear,” Ross said. “To rip the world a new asshole one crack at a time. I can’t wait to get started.”

Review with Forrest MacNeil is a half-hour comedy written and executive produced by Charlie Siskel (Tosh.0) and Andrew Daly, directed by Jeff Blitz and starring Daly as the title character. The project is a send-up of traditional review shows but instead of films, food or art, Forrest MacNeil reviews difficult life experiences by living them. He reviews whatever his TV audience throws at him: the adrenaline rush of stealing, the drama of divorce, the effects of murder, the wonder of anonymous sex. He rates every adventure on a scale of zero to five stars.

After you roast the likes of Flava Flav, Pamela Anderson, Larry the Cable Guy, David Hasselhoff, and Donald Trump, where can Comedy Central possibly go from there? How about taking on Detroit-based white rapper turned americana rock star turned balladeer Kid Rock?

That’s exactly what they have planned this August, as the people who brought us the First Annual Comedy Awards are planning on a celebrity roast to honor the rocker on hist 40th birthday.

NEW YORK, May 9, 2011 – COMEDY CENTRAL announced today that Kid Rock is set to join the likes of Donald Trump, David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson as COMEDY CENTRAL’s next Roastee.  During Kid Rock’s illustrious career as a performer, there has yet to be a single audience that could prepare the five-time Grammy nominee for the vicious onslaught of sharp barbs that will be thrown his way when he takes center stage for the “COMEDY CENTRAL Roast Of Kid Rock.”

The event is currently scheduled to tape on August 14th and will air shortly thereafter. No announcements have been made as to which celebrity roasters will make an appearance, but you can expect the usual gang, and probably an appearance by current touring partner Sheryl Crow.

Remember when roasts used to mean something? Back in the days when names like George Burns and Jack Benny would get together and tear apart a member of the New York Friars’ Club, then a prestigious group of comedians and actors?

Unfortunately, a few other people liked the idea as well, and have decided to run with it in a string of “roasts” for such names as Pamela Anderson, Flava Flav, and Joan Rivers. These picks are painfully easy targets, which turns the concept of a roast into an “acceptable two hours to make fun of you, and you can’t be mad about it.”

Don’t get us wrong, there have been a few choice guests, including Bob Saget, William Shatner, and Denis Leary, but the newest pick of David Hasselhoff has proven that the network is really scraping the bottom of the D-List barrel.  The Hoff doesn’t seem to be in on the joke, as he still thinks these events carry as much prestige as they used to.

“I’m honored that COMEDY CENTRAL is going to get ‘Hoff’ on me,” said David Hasselhoff. “I have always been a major fan of Roasts, dating back to the days of the ‘Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts.’ Laughter is the best medicine. Bring it on! I’m ready to take the heat.”