Who wouldn’t want to see a movie starring the dream cast of James McAvoy, Emily Blunt, Michael Caine and Maggie Smith, with cameos by Ozzy Osbourne, Dolly Parton, Patrick Stewart and Hulk Hogan? They had me at James McAvoy.

Throw in some Shakespeare source material and music by Elton John, and one would think we were set. But Gnomeo and Juliet does the seeming impossible—takes all of these phenomenal elements and churns out a movie that’s only sporadically entertaining and completely forgettable. Unlike its durable garden decoration characters, this movie will wash out of your brain with the first drizzle.

Gnomeo and Juliet’s first and biggest problem is its lack of original, engaging characters. Gnomeo, Gnomeo, wherefore art thou, Gnomeo? Who knows, but he’s just your standard love-stricken youth determined to prove himself to the world and win his girl, while Juliet is your standard spunky heroine who’s trapped in a narrow female role but has the ninja skills to fight out.

Pixar and Dreamworks may monopolize the film animation market, but relatively small effects company Starz Animation is looking to creep up with their latest film, Gnomeo and Juliet. The film is even getting a Disney bump by being distributed through their Touchstone subsidiary. Starz is best known for producing 9 and Space Chimps, unfortunately

The name leaves little to the imagination in terms of plot, but just in case you need it spelled out, the official synopsis should help.

The greatest love story ever told, starring…garden gnomes? In “Gnomeo & Juliet,” Shakespeare’s revered tale gets a comical, off-the-wall makeover. Directed by Kelly Asbury (co-director of “Shrek 2”) and showcasing both classic and original songs by Elton John, the film features the voices of James McAvoy and Emily Blunt as Gnomeo and Juliet, who have as many obstacles to overcome as their quasi namesakes when they are caught up in a feud between neighbors. But with plastic pink flamingos and thrilling lawnmower races in the mix, can this young couple find a happy ending?

Produced in the US with a mainly British cast and music by Elton John, what could possibly go wrong? Check out the full trailer after the jump, and be sure to catch the family-friendly laughs of Gnomeo and Juliet on February 11th.